Depression

5 Damn Good Reasons Why She Killed Herself

 

She was always better to others than they were good to her.

She was even better to others than she was to herself. And that wasn’t good. Other people were her priority and she thought that once, at some point, she’ll meet in life all the love she was showering on others.

She thought that eventually, the good she did will find its way back to her, and all the effort she used to put in people will be rewarded. She never measured how much she gave to others. As long as she made them happy, it was good. Somewhere down the road, she forgot to smile.

She was often left alone.

People were knocking on her door only when they needed something. She was there to comfort them. She was there to boost their confidence and to make them feel good about themselves, but nobody gave a shit about how she felt.

The moment they got what they needed, they’d pack their things and leave, leaving her alone. Not asking her if she was ok. She didn’t need anybody to get her—she only needed someone to care.

She was other people’s dumping ground.

All the evil, all the darkness and misfortune they had, they transferred to her. It was just like she wore a sign telling people how she’s a landfill— so feel free to contaminate her pureness and her good soul with their problems.

She used to be the most positive person in this world. She had the brightest smile, but the toxic people she was surrounded found ways to poison it.

Everybody was so selfish.

As if she was invisible at some point in her life for the rest of the world. Sure, people noticed her, but only in those moments when they needed her. Nobody saw her fake smile and nobody took care of her.

Yes, she was a very welcoming person, smart and strong. She could bear anybody’s burden but only up to some point. When they overburdened her, they left her to deal with it alone. She was only as good as she was needed.

She just couldn’t do it anymore.

She couldn’t be the least relevant person to herself. She just couldn’t put others before her because they made it pretty obvious they were toxic. She learned her lesson. She couldn’t let those toxic people use her anymore so she killed herself. She killed her kind and unselfish side and everybody lost.

And then she learned to say ‘no’.

No, she doesn’t have a moment for you.

No, she doesn’t understand anymore.

No, she can’t help you.

She learned to put herself first. She learned to be her own priority. She learned that when she has nobody to hold her hand, the best thing to do is to put her hands in the pockets and keep walking.

The tables have turned. Now, she’s aware of her worth and she’s aware of everything she deserves. So, the next time you ask why is she such a jerk, maybe you should wonder what you did wrong.

 

Source: https://numerologybox.com
Category: Depression

Roberta Carroll

My approach is eclectic and holistic with a focus on mindfulness. I have received certifications in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Cognitive Processing Therapy (trauma), among others. I spent over 10 years at the Veteran’s Administration in Louisville, KY, working as a psychotherapist with veterans of all ages and genders on a wide variety of issues. Prior to that my focus was on young adults and their families and older adults dealing with loss. Individuals have met with me for help to address depression and anxiety, grief, trauma and relational issues as well as work-related/everyday stressors. The therapeutic process provides a safe place for the client, in collaboration with their therapist, to process distress, discover areas of “stuckness” and move forward into a life of increased meaning and joy. Accepting our imperfections and practicing self-compassion can be a difficult as well as rewarding process. I have lived and worked in different areas of the country, have come to understand how regional differences affect our outlooks and appreciate the contrasts. I have relished the opportunity to assist clients as they carry the burdens of life. It would be my privilege to hear your story.

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