Getting over him

How To Stop Loving Someone Who Doesn’t Love You Back: 10 Ways

 

Wondering how to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you anymore? Worry not, you’ll find the answer to this question and many other sub-questions below, so stay tuned.

There is no doubt about one thing—unrequited love is one of the most painful things you can experience.

It doesn’t matter if you are in love with someone who doesn’t feel the same way, if your partner has stopped loving you or if they simply don’t love you enough.

The point is the same—loving someone who doesn’t love you back sucks.

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Besides feeling that your emotions are out of your control, you also wonder why you aren’t enough for this person to love you back.

sad young girl sitting outdoorAt the same time, you keep hoping that things will eventually change even though deep down you know they never will.

Obviously, coping with a one-way love situation is never easy, and that is something everyone who’s been there knows (including myself).

What is even more difficult is saving yourself from it and getting over someone who doesn’t love you in the most harmless way possible. Nevertheless, it can be done.

Before we switch to the main part on how to stop loving someone, let’s first answer some critical questions!

What Do You Do If Someone Doesn’t Love You Back?

sad woman standing alone by the lakeWhen you love someone who doesn’t love you back, you can either keep hoping that things will change and you’ll eventually be on the same page, or you can decide to move on.

So, you have two options here:

  • You can choose to wait for them to fall in love with you (or to come back to you).
  • You can choose to move on, live your life to the fullest and focus on other things that bring you joy.

If you choose the former, know that no one can guarantee you that they will change. You can keep showering them with affection and go out of your way to make them notice you but, in the end, you can’t force anyone to love you back.

If you choose to do the latter, know that it can take a long time to completely move on and eventually stop loving them. As always, if you stay determined, you will succeed.

I have a few questions for you now:

Do you deep down inside know (or feel) that nothing will change in the near future?

Do you want to free yourself from false hopes and start focusing on your happiness instead of being the prisoner of unrequited love?

If you answered yes, then letting go is the best choice (assuming you want to avoid a modern disease called having a broken heart). If you choose to do so, below you’ll find lots of helpful tips on how to stop loving someone.

Can You Stop Loving Someone If You Truly Loved Them?

Actually, you can never stop loving the person you truly loved but you can learn to manage those feelings in healthy ways so they don’t continue causing you pain.

When we talk about the ways on how to stop loving someone, we actually talk about the ways to redirect your feelings.

You can decide to accept unrequited love as something that was meant to happen. You have the power to make the best of your love for someone who doesn’t love you back.

You can accept the unrequited love as a valuable experience. Also, you can choose to perceive your ability to love as an admiring trait because it takes a strong person and a brave heart to continue loving someone who doesn’t love you back.

So, what will you do? It’s completely up to you.

How Do You Let Go Of Someone Who Doesn’t Love You?

sad woman sitting on the bed holding a cupLetting go of someone who doesn’t love you back means getting determined to cut off all contact with them and fully commit to living your own life. It also means believing that your true love is somewhere out there and you’ll meet them when the right time comes.

Before deciding to let go, ask yourself the following questions:

  • How determined are you to actually let go of them?
  • Do you have enough reasons that indicate they don’t love you back and might never will?
  • Are you ready to cut all contact with them?
  • Do you believe that you’ll find the right one for you in the future?

If you’re not 100% determined to move on with your life, then you’ll have a hard time letting go. The same thing applies to the rest of the questions.

If you don’t have enough solid reasons that they don’t love you back, you’ll still overthink things and false hope might prevail.

If you aren’t ready to cut all contact with them, you’ll come to the temptation to call them or text them. And, finally, if you don’t believe that you’ll eventually meet the right one for you, you’ll have difficulties leaving your unrequited love and your past behind.

To let go means reorganizing your life in a way where the sole focus is on you and what’s best for you. Are you ready for it? I bet you are!

How To Stop Loving Someone Who Doesn’t Love You Anymore: 10 Ways To Move On

Admit your feelings to yourself

woman meditates on the sandThe first step toward resolving any problem is recognizing it, and your situation is no exception.

First and foremost, you need to stop running away from your feelings because pretending that they are not there won’t make them magically go away.

So, the truth is that you care for someone who doesn’t see you in the same way. That you love the person who doesn’t love you back the way you would want them to.

However, not being loved in return is nothing to be ashamed of. Instead of trying to repress your emotions, be brutally honest about everything you feel and about the way the other person might feel about you.

Acknowledge the fact that they were a massive part of your life (if they were) and now you feel like your whole world is falling apart which is totally normal.

Once you express your feelings to yourself, you’ll know exactly what you have to deal with. Is this something temporary or your unrequited love for this person is deeper than that?

 

Don’t hold it inside

Wondering how to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you? Well, don’t hold it inside you.

When you love someone for a long time, getting over them and moving on with your life is everything but easy. That is why it is something you shouldn’t have to go through alone.

Remember that there is nothing wrong with verbalizing your emotions and asking for advice from your best friends, family members, and other people you know care for you.

Holding your emotions inside and trying to fight them on your own doesn’t make you any stronger.

Asking for help from your loved ones is the thing you ought to do every time you feel like you can’t take it anymore, and there is no shame in doing so.

Look at things optimistically

The thing you have to avoid if you want to stop loving someone is getting into despair and seeing this as if it’s the end of the world.

Things like these simply happen to everyone and this is something you will get over quickly, even though you don’t know it at this moment.

Instead of looking at everything pessimistically, try your best to have a positive outlook on the situation. Remember that everything goes away sooner or later and so will this pain you are feeling now.

Think of all the situations from your past which appeared unresolvable for you. Nevertheless, you’ve managed to overcome all of your problems and obstacles, haven’t you?

So what makes this one different? What makes you think that you’ll be forever stuck in this situation?

I know that you don’t see a way out now but you have to trust me on this one—time heals all wounds, and it will do the same with yours.

You just have to have faith in God and in your own strength that you will make it through this.

Accept the situation

The next step into this process is to really accept the harsh truth, no matter how painful it might be.

It’s time for you to focus all of your energy on the present because it is the only way for you to take a leap into the bright future you deserve. It’s time to make peace with reality.

It is possible for this person to have you loved you in the past, and maybe that is the reason you keep holding on to them.

Or you keep getting your hopes up that they will grow to love you sometime in the future.

STOP.

Instead of overthinking, accept the situation as it is:

  • You are living in this moment and this is the moment in which this person doesn’t love you.
  • Stop thinking about what went on between the two of you, of everything that might happen and of all the things that could have been.
  • Accept the end of a relationship and forget all your false hopes.
  • Stop loving this person into their potential, stop lying to yourself and waiting for a miraculous change to happen.
  • Concentrate on getting out of this pain you are feeling right now and forget about everything else.

Don’t blame anyone for the situation

woman praying outdoorIf you want to learn how to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you back, then don’t make this one mistake.

One of the biggest mistakes you can make when you experience unrequited love is looking for someone to blame for everything.

In the same way you can’t force yourself to unlove someone, this person can’t force themself to give you back the love they’ve been getting from you.

So please, don’t think of yourself as a fool for feeling all of this. Don’t think of yourself as not enough or not worthy of love.

Just because one person doesn’t care for you doesn’t mean that you’ll never get the love you deserve. Also, do your best not to turn your disappointment into hatred towards the object of your affection.

There is nothing wrong in having feelings for someone, but bitterness and unnecessary anger will only make you look desperate.

Give yourself time to heal

Before even starting with overcoming this emotional pain you are going through, I have to warn you not to expect miracles.

No, this doesn’t mean that you’ll be forever hooked on this person. It only means that healthy healing is a process that takes energy, time and effort.

So please, don’t expect things to drastically change overnight.

Before considering new potential love interests, give yourself and your love life some time to heal. Practice self-care and focus on expressing yourself in different ways. (Yes, crying is one way of expressing yourself).

Instead of pretending that you are OK, give yourself enough time to grieve. Instead of holding your emotions all bottled up, let them loose one way or another and let yourself heal.

If you feel like crying or screaming, this is exactly what you should do. If you want to take a few days to sleep it off, do that.

Just make sure not to exaggerate, and don’t allow this behavior to become a habit of yours.

Break all ties

worried woman in standing in deep thoughtsI’m sure you’ve already heard about the no contact rule. Well, in your case scenario, you won’t be using this technique to get your ex back but to help you forget the person you love.

What you have to do is cut all ties with this person, even if it’s the most painful thing you’ll ever have to do. Understand that you can never get over someone if you are in constant touch with them, one way or another.

So, how to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you back?

Block this person on all social media and delete their number! Stop showing up at places where you know you’ll encounter them, and at least in the beginning, try cutting off the people who remind you of them.

I know that sometimes, the only person who can make us feel better when we are at our lowest is the one who caused us to be that way in the first place.

Nevertheless, every time you think of contacting them because you miss them, remember that if you do so, you’ll just prolong your agony and break your heart all over again.

Put a stop to whatever relation you have with this person and tell your final goodbye to them because it’s the only way to help yourself be better.

Get rid of everything reminding you of the person

The same goes with getting rid of all the things (known as memorabilia) that might remind you of the person you love.

Throw away everything they gave you, delete all of your pictures together and stop listening to the songs that you connect with them.

This is the only way for you to remove this person from your mind and heart, instead of just moving away from them physically.

Think of the good sides

sad blond woman sitting on chairA lot of people struggle when it comes to finding a silver lining and taping into positivity. Instead of looking at your heartbreak as the end of the world, try looking for its positive sides.

Be on the lookout for new ways to enrich your life and make yourself happy. Protect your own mental wellness.

Have in mind that this struggle is actually a blessing because it will, without doubt, teach you a valuable life lesson.

Think of this as a test of your strength and as something which will shape you into becoming the best possible version of yourself.

Falling in love with someone who doesn’t love you back will surely help you understand what should be your priorities.

It will teach you never to put so much effort into someone who doesn’t deserve it, and it will make you understand that loving yourself more than loving anyone else is always a must.

Enjoy your single life and do what makes you happy

After you’ve done all the necessary steps to help yourself get out of this painful situation, the next thing you have to do is make sure you don’t go back to feeling all of these emotions.

How to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you back?

And the only way to do it is to refocus all of your energy from this person to yourself.

Keep yourself busy at all times, so you have less time to think about your heartbreak. Do the things which make you happy, and enjoy every moment of your life.

Find a new hobby, spend time with your friends and family, work on boosting your self-esteem. Remember that self-love should be your priority.

Instead of trying to get over your ex by jumping into a new relationship, embrace your single life and get the most out of it. Give your physical and mental health some love and attention.

Work on improving yourself and on putting a smile back on your face because you are the only one who can do it. When you stop loving someone who doesn’t love you back, you’ll realize that you’re the creator of your own happiness.

Final Thoughts

sad woman sitting by the window and plant

How to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you back? You’ll do it by redirecting your thoughts and focusing on improving your life.

Once you accept and redirect your thoughts, your emotions will follow. Remember that moving on is not about forgetting someone but it’s about learning to live with your feelings and minimizing pain.

Once you do that, you’ll gradually decrease the importance of their presence in your life and your unrequited feelings will become a thing of the past.

 

Source: https://numerologybox.com
Category: Getting over him

Roberta Carroll

My approach is eclectic and holistic with a focus on mindfulness. I have received certifications in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Cognitive Processing Therapy (trauma), among others. I spent over 10 years at the Veteran’s Administration in Louisville, KY, working as a psychotherapist with veterans of all ages and genders on a wide variety of issues. Prior to that my focus was on young adults and their families and older adults dealing with loss. Individuals have met with me for help to address depression and anxiety, grief, trauma and relational issues as well as work-related/everyday stressors. The therapeutic process provides a safe place for the client, in collaboration with their therapist, to process distress, discover areas of “stuckness” and move forward into a life of increased meaning and joy. Accepting our imperfections and practicing self-compassion can be a difficult as well as rewarding process. I have lived and worked in different areas of the country, have come to understand how regional differences affect our outlooks and appreciate the contrasts. I have relished the opportunity to assist clients as they carry the burdens of life. It would be my privilege to hear your story.

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